Christian single mom and dating
Visits and comments poured in from all over the country about how to make courtship work and why it did not work. I’m talking the kind of couples who first kissed at their wedding were filing for divorce. The deal was that if we put up with the rules and awkwardness of courtship now we could avoid the pain of divorce later.
Each year I waited for courtship to start working and for my homeschool friends to start getting married. The whole point of courtship was to have a happy marriage, not a high divorce rate.
This meant that by the time she was 17 years old she knew which Bob she wanted to marry.
They got married and stayed married till my grandfather passed away half a century later.
But here are the elements most conservative communities have in common: My grandmother grew up in a marginally Christian community.
People went to church on Sunday, but that was the extent of their religious activity.
I explained what courtship was and quoted Joshua Harris, chapter and verse. “I don’t think courtship is a smart idea,” my grandfather said.
“How can you tell who you want to marry if you aren’t going out on dates? I ignored their advice on relationships, preferring to listen to the young people around me who were passionate advocates of courtship.
I talked with homeschool parents, students and alumni all over the country and started to see some challenges with making courtship work.“If I had only gone out with 3 or 4 guys I wouldn’t have known what I wanted in a husband,” she said.It is not that her parents were uninvolved; it is that they played an advisory role, particularly as she entered high school and they relaxed the rules about not going steady.So what on earth were they doing that worked so well?
Over dinner, my grandmother shared her story about what dating was like back in the 30s and 40s.
Dating was evil and Courtship, whatever it was, was godly, good and Biblical.