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08-Jul-2016 23:16

We tell men to keep their attraction to trans women secret, to limit it to the internet, frame it as a passing fetish or transaction.In effect, we’re telling trans women that they are only deserving of secret interactions with men, further demeaning and stigmatizing trans women.He must do this to maintain his standing in our patriarchal society.For a man to be associated with a trans women, in effect, is to say that he is no longer a “real” man (as if such a thing exists) because he sleeps with “fake” women (as if such a thing exists). As there are many kinds of women, there are many kinds of men, and many men desire many kinds of women, trans women are amongst these women. The shame that society attaches to these men, specifically attacking their sexuality and shaming their attraction, directly affects trans women. It amplifies our body-image issues, our self-esteem, our sense of possibility, of daring for greatness, of aiming for something or somewhere greater.We are worthy of being seen and are not dirty or shameful.Until we begin checking how we delegitimize the identities, bodies and existence of trans women and stigmatize the men who yearn to with us, we will continue to marginalize our sisters, pushing them further into socially-sanctioned invisibility, left in the dark to fend for themselves with men who don’t have the space to explore, define and embrace their attraction to various women. Be respectful of people’s identities, bodies and pronouns.This anti-trans woman ideology is harmful, misogynistic and pervasive and travels way beyond the comments section of gossip blogs, and as Sylvia Rivera once said, “I will no longer put up with this shit.” I am a trans woman. I had learned that I was unworthy and undeserving, and it took me years to release myself from the shame and stigma society had forced upon me as a young woman.A man’s desire for my body, my brain, my brilliance and my existence is not a laughing matter because I am not a joke.

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He recognized me as a woman, and my being trans did not negate my womanhood. Don’t get me wrong, I see our loving partnership as a blessing, but not in the same way others view it.

This questioning has led many well-known men to adamantly defend their heterosexuality and has tarnished the reputation and careers of others.



The first cycle of this four-year process ended in 2011; the second cycle will take place during 2012-2016 47 states accepted recommendations on corporal punishment: Andorra; Armenia; Azerbaijan; Bangladesh; Belize; Bolivia; Brunei Darussalam; Chad; Comoros; Dominican Republic; El Salvador; Estonia; Ghana; Honduras; Hungary; Jamaica; Japan; Jordan; Kuwait; Kyrgyzstan; Latvia; Lesotho; Mali; Mexico; Mongolia; Nicaragua; Niger; Palau; Panama; Papua New Guinea; Qatar; Rwanda; Samoa; San Marino; Sao Tome and Principe; Saudi Arabia; Senegal; Serbia; Slovakia; Slovenia; Solomon Islands; Suriname; Switzerland; Turkey; Tuvalu; Vanuatu; Yemen 22 states rejected recommendations on corporal punishment: Albania; Australia; Bahamas; Barbados; Belgium; Botswana; Brunei Darussalam; Comoros; Dominica; Eritrea; Ethiopia; Georgia; Italy; Malta; Myanmar; Saudi Arabia; Singapore; St Lucia; St Vincent and the Grenadines; Sudan; UK; United Arab Emirates 23 states which have yet to achieve full prohibition neither accepted nor rejected recommendations on corporal punishment, or have still to make their responses: Argentina; Belarus; Bhutan; Canada; Cape Verde; Djibouti; Gabon; Gambia; Grenada; Guatemala; Guyana; Kiribati; Libyan Arab Jamahiriya; Malawi; Malaysia; Maldives; Mauritania; Republic of Korea; Seychelles; Somalia; South Africa; St Kitts and Nevis; TFYR Macedonia Source: Global Initiative to End All Corporal Punishment of Children – December 2011 Percentage of global child population legally protected from all corporal punishment Protected in all settings including the home: 4.9% Protected in some settings: 61.2% Not protected fully in any setting: 33.9% Source: Global Initiative to End All Corporal Punishment of Children – December 2011 Quotes "Physical punishment is prohibited in all maintained and full-time independent schools, in children’s homes, in local authority foster homes and Early Years provision." "Parents have not been explicitly prohibited from smacking their children." Department for Education 2011 "Corporal punishment of children breaches their fundamental rights to respect for their human dignity and physical integrity.… continue reading »


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I even received a solicitation for a “lucrative opportunity”. Most introverts express themselves better in writing than in-person conversation. That is, until it comes to making small talk over the Internet.… continue reading »


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According to Bad Boy A&R Daniel 'Skid' Mitchell, rather than largely relying on the one songwriter-producer, the new album's mix of writers and producers, as well as her own co-write input, makes it a more personal record for her.… continue reading »


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